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i feel so tired.
what i ate today :
- 1/3 plate of chic rice from ITAS.
- 1 bottle of sugar cane drink
- 1 bottle of green tea
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL~ so bored.
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sometimes i wonder..if i let the hate dissipate, will the fear and pain start to seep in?if i stop the tears from coming out, will i then be free from pity?so so so sick of this.zz.
anw ate a meal today.mummy made me eat. 
she says that i’m probably so weak recently bcos i dont eat.maybe i have an eating disorder.hahahaa.trust me.im definately not on a diet.i dont really care abt diets and stuff.its just that my appetite as been like close to 0 all this time.hw long now?probably abt 3 weeks or so.it just dawned on me that it’s probably the reason why i keep falling asleep all the time.no food in the system to be burned for energy.thus, i am energy-less. LOL. i wonder..will i go to sleep and not have the energy to wake up.and thus die in my sleep? ^^
and then i think again.nahh~ would god be so sweet to lemme die in my sleep.probably not.zz.and so i’ve decided.i cant be bothered to eat. LOL. i dont have a death wish.but i really dont have the appetite at all.sis says i should be more err..whats the word..”strong”?
i think im doing pretty okay.apart from the dips into melancholy and emo-ism, and that not eating part.im fine.zz.at least im not bawling and drownin in self-pity.zz.i feel so sleepy..haha.worked today.carried the dumb 5.5L water tank frm the toilet.and it was leaking.WTF.my energy level is like 3%.almost killed me.had to open the door summore.i carried the dumb water with 1 arm.stylo milo~ carol got muscles alr.felt really tired.but cldnt sleep on the train back.had too much on my mind.i wanna get it out.extract the vacuous thoughts.put the black room in.and today the emo pirate dropped by bunk.I HARDWORKING OKAY.I DONT JUST ‘SLACK’!
hahaahahahaaaa.demented.too tired to blog.dug out old songs.i need to take my mind off.
x listenin to : goldfrapp, mono, pete yorn, velvet underground.
